Friday, September 1, 2023

Rosh haShanah 5784 - A Time for Healing

 Rabbi’s Column - Rosh haShanah 5784 - A Time for Healing


עֲבֵרוֹת שֶׁבֵּין אָדָם לַמָּקוֹם, יוֹם הַכִּפּוּרִים מְכַפֵּר. עֲבֵרוֹת שֶׁבֵּין אָדָם לַחֲבֵרוֹ, אֵין יוֹם הַכִּפּוּרִים מְכַפֵּר, עַד שֶׁיְּרַצֶּה אֶת חֲבֵרוֹ

Regarding transgressions between a human being and the Divine, Yom Kippur provides atonement. Regarding transgressions between one human being and their fellow human being, Yom Kippur does not provide atonement, until the one [who transgressed] has satisfied their fellow human being.

Mishnah Yoma 8:9b


Happy New Year! In a few days, we will gather together as a congregation to celebrate another time that the earth has gone around the sun (or, more accurately by the Jewish luni-solar calendar, the 12 times the moon has gone around the earth). In our congregational family, this time is for many things - a chance for those who have not seen each other to meet and greet - either in person or on-line, to have some round challah, apples and honey, to hear from our Temple President about how things are going, to collect the flyers and plan out our Temple year, and/or to bring food for our annual drive.


Of course, there is another purpose to the Jewish New Year - t’shuvah. Our tradition reminds us that we might not have traveled exactly the path that we wished in the previous year, and we should take time to look back and make whatever corrections might be necessary.  Ideally, we self-correct during the whole year, but, as human beings, we often need to be reminded how important it is to stop and to take stock.


T’shuvah can take many paths. For some of us, we have made promises to ourselves that we have not fulfilled, and we need to re-evaluate, refocus, or recommit. We may have made promises to God - full of great hopes last Rosh haShanah of what impact we would like to make in the world.  Very often, we have not behaved toward those around us in the way that we should, or wished we could have.  We would like to imagine that, in the twenty or so minutes of the repentance part of our Yom Kippur service, we can make that right, but the text above from the mishnah reminds us that there is other work that we have to do first.  The Day of Atonement does not atone for transgressions between one person and another, until that other person is satisfied with their reparations.


As we approach this season of t’shuvah, let us take time to listen to those around us - not only to know what it is that they would have us do to make amends, but to listen to learn about grievances that may not even be on our radar.  In addition, as a congregation, we hope to listen to each member of our community and learn what it is that would strengthen and/or heal your relationship with the Temple.  But, we do not know what we do not know.  If there is some way that we can make things better, please reach out and let us know what that might be. We do not want to wait until there is such a rift that it would take miles of effort to heal. That is why we take this moment each year - to heal ourselves and our relationships.


May we all move forward in true t’shuvah and have a sweet and happy New Year.


Rabbi Abraham



Monday, July 31, 2023

July/August 2023 - It’s Because of the People...

 Rabbi’s Column - July/August 2023 - It’s Because of the People...

There is an enlarged poster-sized photograph hanging on the wall of the first floor common room at URJ Eisner Camp’s Emily and Kivie Kaplan Conference Center, where the faculty live in the summer, which says, “Eisner, it’s because of the people who come here.” To the great amusement of the faculty who hang out in that room, the picture is of Eisner’s lake and several buildings, but there are no people in it.


Over the past few months, I have spoken with a few families who have chosen to let their Temple membership lapse.  The reasons which they have shared with me are both diverse and similar.  One family said that they had hoped to find more of a community, but, perhaps because of COVID, they had not.  Another shared that they had been involved when their children were involved, but now they were less attached. Another moved to another congregation because that was where their younger child had more friends. 


A number of years ago, we convened a group to figure out how to increase Shabbat service attendance. To our surprise, most congregants appreciated the structure and content of our Friday night worship - that was not what was keeping them away.  Rather, the biggest draw for people to come to services was not the service itself, but rather, knowing who else was going to be there.  


The last service in June, we celebrated the centenary of Natalie Darwin - a long-time and dedicated member of the Temple, as well as an honorary member of our Board of Trustees.  One of the reasons that Natalie is an Honorary Trustee is that she shows up: she showed up to Board meetings, but she also has made a practice of coming to whatever Temple event may be on the calendar.  What made that so special was that Natalie made friends across all age groups and generations.  Although COVID has made showing up in person more difficult, when there is a Temple event that is on-line, Natalie will log on at least an hour in advance to make sure she is connected in time.


We have a beautiful Temple building, but that is not our congregation. What makes Temple Sholom special is the people.  Unfortunately, that is a secret best known by the Temple staff and leadership, and those few who make the effort to attend so many Temple events.  COVID made us reprioritize what was important, and where we made an effort. Many of us focussed on our families and our health, often outdoor activities. Once the doors were opened, we wanted to travel to all the places that we missed.  Below the radar was how much we missed being present at the Temple - seeing people that we already knew, meeting those we did not, and getting to know those who were just acquaintances.


Our Temple leadership is working hard to bring back those opportunities to build up our congreagation - but they need help.  Help in the organizing of any Temple events - large or small - is, of course, always welcome.  Sometimes, the most important thing you can do is just show up - not only put a Temple event on your calendar, but make the effort, when the time comes, to get off the couch, get in the car, and come to the Temple.  All I can say is that you probably won’t regret it and, if you do, tell us so we can make it better next time.  We are all trying.


Being a part of a strong and caring community not only takes the effort of its members, but also returns more than it requires.  Ask any of our members who have been ill and had meals made for them by fellow congregants; those who have lost someone close to them, and been comforted knowing that they are remembered not only in our sanctuary, but in the presence of those at shivah. The High HolyDays are coming up. They are not only a time for us to think back on our past, and imagine our future, but they are also the biggest reunion of the Temple year - a chance to check in with old friends and acquaintances, to see how children have grown, to share news with those who truly care.  Rosh haShanah begins at sundown on Friday, September 15th.


I hope to see you there.


Sunday, March 5, 2023

March/April 2023 - עוֹד לֹא אָבְדָה תִּקְוָתֵנוּ We Have Not Lost Our Hope

לִבִּי בְמִזְרָח וְאָנֹכִי בְּסוֹף מַעֲרָב

My heart is in the East, and I am in the uttermost West Yehuda haLevi


[Normally, after returning from a sabbatical, I would use this space to share what I have learned over that time (for which I am very grateful to the congregation). However, with all that is happening in Israel at this moment, I feel compelled to share my thoughts on my post-Sabbatical trip to Israel last month.]


Judah haLevi, the medieval Jewish poet, who lived in the multicultural world of Muslim Spain, wrote the words above, as part of a longer poem about his ambivalence toward being a Jew living outside the land of Israel.  As reflected in Jewish prayer, since the exile in the early part of the first millennium, we have felt pulled toward the land of Israel, wherever we may be. That pull has changed over the years - reflecting a dream (עם תרצו אין זו אגדה - If we will it, it will be no dream - Herzl) and now a reality. And yet, the connection between the land and the people of Israel - scattered across the globe - may be more tenuous and more needed than ever.  


On the one hand, seeing the rise of vocal and violent anti-Semitism in places where it has lain hidden and dormant (while we had hoped it dead) and legitimized in places where it had always been whispered or even shouted, many Jews have not only seen clearly the importance of a state of and for Jews, which will not only welcome any Jew as a citizen, but will defend them abroad, but have personally decided to take advantage of that offer by making aliyah and taking up Israeli citizenship. On the other, looking at the make up of the current Israeli ruling coalition, seeing the legislations it has proposed, the xenophobic statements of its ministers, and the increasing civil resistance in Israel, and the death and persecution of Israel’s Arab population, many Jews have, if not washed their hands of any connection with the State of Israel, are resistant to any conversation or contemplation of what the phrase כל ישראל ערבים זה בזה - All Israelites are responsible, one for the other means to them.


I spent a little more than a week in Israel. I stood between my female colleagues and other Jewish women who wanted to celebrate the onset of the joyous month of Adar, by singing and praying together at the wall - and little children kicking them, teenagers shouting and blowing on whistles, and adults spitting on their Torah scroll. I marched with tens of thousands of (mainly) asheknazi Jews in Tel Aviv chanting “דמוקרסיה - Democracy”, desperate to stop a narrow coalition government from cementing its powers by undermining the power of the judiciary. I sat with Arabs (who called themselves Palestinians) and Jews (who called themselves Israelis) in a poor town on the other side of Israel’s airport, where individuals might get along, but communities could not cooperate, leaving them all the poorer.  


On the bright side: When I lived in Israel thirty years ago, I saw plenty of what were then identified as Arabs - whether Israeli Arabs or from the Territories.  They worked in the service and industrial sectors all over Israel.  Our feeling was that Israelis might be suspicious of Palestinians as a group (this was the year of the Oslo Accords), but everyone trusted “their” Arabs.  Over my visits since, those people had disappeared, and I was amazed - from the GETT driver at the train station, to the staff at my hotel - they had re-appeared. (Note - it is not that one can spot the difference between a Palestinian Arab and a Jew based on appearances, but I judged because people spoke Arabic to each other, or had Arabic rather than Hebrew names.)  On our various visits, we learned that this was both a sign of hope and of despair.  Since the barrier wall was completed 15 years ago, East Jerusalem was cut off from the Territories. In recent times, and especially in the younger generations, that population (mostly eligible for Israeli citizenship, but not registered) has started, out of necessity, working and shopping in West Jerusalem, and around the country.  I had lunch twice at Abu Shukri in the First Train Station, which is a second location of a famous Arab  falafel stand in the Old City, which has now moved to this trendy market (which was the old train station, 30 years ago). There is still not equality of opportunity, or of government services in Arab neighborhoods (which are shrinking, as Jews use biased laws to take homes from Palestinian owners), but at least there is daily interaction.


Fifteen years ago, I sat with a delegation to the Deputy Consul of Israel in New York, as we expressed our concern that, related to the government’s policies about the Western Wall, American Jews were feeling less and less welcome visiting Israel.  The Deputy Consul laughed at our concerns - he did not think that could happen.  Now I see, sadly, that Israel is rarely even a topic of conversation among the members of our congregation, let alone a source of pride.  We have completed one successful trip to Israel in my 23 year tenure, but did not have enough interest for a small delegation to attend the Federation’s upcoming Centennial Mission.


Rabbi Josh Weinberg (URJ Vice President and head of the Association of Reform Zionists of America (You can find him at ARZA.org) shared a powerful message.  The Reform Movement has decided that we dare not disengage from Israel at this critical juncture.  If we, as Jews, wish to see the dream of Zionism continue to be true, we need to double down on our support of our progressive (both religiously and politically) allies in Israel, and lift up our voices in protest when we see Israel doing wrong.  I encourage you to build or strengthen your own connection through our partners like the Israeli Movement for Progressive Judaism (IMPJ), or the Israeli Religious Action Center (IRAC).  Other organizations of interest are Rabbis for Human Rights, the New Israel Fund, Hiddush (which fights for religious equality in Israel), or Women of the Wall.  ARZA will be kicking off a campaign this year to build up for the World Zionist Congress elections in 2025, which are Diaspora Jewry’s biggest voice of political power.


I have a t-shirt that I received at the demonstration on Saturday night which says נאמינים למגילת העצמאות - Believers in the Scroll of Independence.  In the United States, we call our founding document the Declaration of Independence.  In the Jewish State, the founding document* is a megillah - a scroll. As we prepare to read another famous Jewish scroll - the megillat Esther - to remind us of our victories for freedom, let us gird ourselves for this fight as well. For, as Mordechai said to Esther:

וּמִ֣י יוֹדֵ֔עַ אִם־לְעֵ֣ת כָּזֹ֔את הִגַּ֖עַתְּ לַמַּלְכֽוּת 

Who knows, perhaps, just for this crisis, you have come to this exalted position. Megillat Esther 4:14b


* You can find the Israeli Scroll of Independence here. It includes the words, “THE STATE OF ISRAEL will be open for Jewish immigration and for the Ingathering of the Exiles; it will foster the development of the country for the benefit of all its inhabitants; it will be based on freedom, justice and peace as envisaged by the prophets of Israel; it will ensure complete equality of social and political rights to all its inhabitants irrespective of religion, race or sex; it will guarantee freedom of religion, conscience, language, education and culture; it will safeguard the Holy Places of all religions; and it will be faithful to the principles of the Charter of the United Nations.”