Next Year Where? - April 2015

Bashanah haba’ah b’yirushalayim

Next year in Jerusalem - traditional last line of the Haggadah

This year, as every year, all those who go back to the haggadah after the meal will end with the traditional “Next Year in Jerusalem”.  The Reform Baskin Haggadah, which we use at our congregational seder, also adds, “Next year may all be free.”  For Jews throughout the ages, the end of the Exodus, which we commemorate on Passover, is the arrival in the Promised Land.  Yet, very few of us actually end of fulfilling the dream of our seders and find ourselves in Israel in the following year.

I would like to suggest a few ways that we can bring that dream a little closer:

1. Travel to Israel - Two and a half years ago, we had our first successful Temple Sholom trip in many years.  This past summer, we put together a trip, but had to combine with another congregation to send our members.  Israel is a place to experience at least once in your life. It is a place to experience with family; a place to experience with your Temple community.  We have set up our previous trips in the summer, so that we can find ten days for families with school age children to travel.  Our next scheduled trip will be in summer 2016.  If you are interested in coming on a Temple Sholom trip then, or have a group who would like to travel at another time, just let us know.

2. Help make the real Israel more like our ideal Israel - Too often, we tune out the news about Israel.  The conflict, the difficulty of having to face the realities of two populations in one land, the fear of being shouted down by friends, all make Israel a much avoided topic of conversation.  Still, it is the Jewish State and, as Jews, we are not only tied to our homeland, but we bear a responsibility for what happens there.  We do have a voice in Israel’s government - the World Zionist Congress is the place where we Diaspora Jews can have our say.  You can vote by computer until the end of this month.  https://www.reformjews4israel.org/ takes you to the ARZA (Association of Reform Zionists of America) voting site.  You can vote for ARZA’s Progressive slate, or find information about any of the other parties.  If you want a voice in Israel, you need to vote.  (There is a $10 charge for voting.)

3. Work for freedom - American Jewish World Service works for freedom overseas (http://ajws.org/).  There are many ways that we, as American citizens, can work to protect, preserve, and extend freedom in our own country as well.  Freedom is not just the opposite of slavery.  True freedom is the ability to make the same choices as anyone else in society.  We work for freedom when we give a hand up to those who are deprived; when we stand up for the rights of others; when we refuse to be silent when others are maligned.  We are told in the Torah to tell the story of the Exodus from Egypt as if we ourselves were slaves.  The point is not to suffer ourselves, but to be able to see the story of those who are still in chains.

Pesach celebrates the greatest moment in our history that was done to us: We were freed from Egypt.  Over the next seven weeks, we march to the greatest moment that we made ourselves.  On Shavuot, we once again stand at the base of Mount Sinai and enter into covenant with God.  That covenant puts us in partnership with God to fulfill the promise of creation.  Let that be our Jerusalem and let us find ourselves closer to that goal, each and every year.

Chag sameach,

Rabbi Abraham

No Barriers, No Stumbling Blocks- February 2015

Lo t’kaleil cheresh; v’lifnei iver, lo titein mikshol.

Do not curse the deaf; nor put a stumbling block before the blind. - Lev. 19:14

February is Jewish Disability Awareness Month and our Temple’s Inclusion Committee, led by Jill Harris, has planned varied activities - including speakers at Friday evening services, celebrating Shabbat Shalem,  an in-service for our teaching staff, and completing our application to become the first MetroWest Able Awarded congregation in Union County.  In January, the Board of Trustees passed the following wording to be added to our webpage and publicity - Temple Sholom strives to be an inclusive and accessible synagogue, welcoming to all who wish to meaningfully participate in our Jewish community.

Of course, the commemoration of Jewish Disability Awareness Month does not mean we ignore those with different needs the rest of the year, but rather re-dedicate ourselves to making our congregation and community accessible to everyone.  One of the joys of giving tours of our new building is showing how we have put the idea of being a no-barrier synagogue into practice.  In addition to having ADA required handicapped accessible bathrooms and our audio assistance loop, the entire building is one floor, with no steps inside.  Moveable chairs mean that people in wheelchairs can sit anywhere in the sanctuary.  Our doors are wide-open - and wide-opening.

In the Holiness Code, which we read on the afternoon of Yom Kippur, quoted above, we are commanded not to curse the deaf, nor put a stumbling block before the blind.  The simple meaning of this last phrase is that we should not take advantage of someone’s disability.  The blind cannot see what we might put in front of them.  The first part of the phrase takes us farther.  The deaf cannot hear us when we curse them, but they do not hear our curse either.  Hence we are taught not to mock someone’s disability, even if they cannot know we are doing it.  I would argue, however, that the force of this verse goes even further.  It is not sufficient to not behave badly to those who may be differently abled.  Rather, we are challenged to give them the fairness that is available to everyone else  We must help the blind to see, and the deaf to hear, if not literally, then by providing the accommodations that enable them to function in a world that is geared toward people with those abilities.

How, the, as a congregation, can we accomplish this task?  We must exercise our empathy to imagine what might be a stumbling block to others, and remove it before they can trip.  Rabbi Neal Gold once told me about a conversation with a colleague who said that his congregation had never needed an interpreter for the deaf to translate services, as no deaf people ever came to services.  His response was, “Of course.”  Why should people assume that we can accommodate them, if we have not let them know that we can and will do so?

For many years, we have worked to build our Religious School’s reputation as a place that welcomes all students, no matter what their needs or abilities.  All we ask is that you bring a willingness to be a part of our community and to learn about Judaism.  We have welcomed many families - but there may be many more, looking for a Jewish home, who have not yet found us.  There is a stumbling block in the way.  Each of us, as members of this community, need to find those stumbling blocks and remove them; clear the path to our doorway; and welcome everyone inside - not just in February, but every day of the year.  If you know of any person or family who is looking for a Jewish home, but does not think there is a place for them - let us know and we will find a way to remove those barriers.

A Festival of a Different Light - December 2014

V’etzarcha v’etencha livrit am, l’or goyim

And I have created you, and I have given you to be a people of covenant, a light to the nations.

Isaiah 42:6

Chanukah is is called chag haneirot - the festival of lights.  We celebrate not only the story of the miracle of the oil that lasted long enough to rededicate the Temple in Jerusalem, but the light we bring into the world.  Hillel and Shammai, the ancient sages, argued over whether one should light eight lights on the first night of Chanukah and then diminish by one each day, or to start with one, and add a light each night until we reached eight.  The debate was whether we acknowledge the days getting shorter and go with the flow of nature, or resist by bringing our own light to brighten the dark nights.  Bringing light into the world won, and we therefore increase the glow of our menorot as Chanukah progresses.

We are commanded to be an or l’goyim - a light to the other nations. When we were an oppressed and downtrodden minority, this seemed an ironic injunction.  We sought to fulfill it by being the brightest and smartest.  Now that we have our own nation, we struggle to both be a normal country, like any other, and to be the exemplar of Judaism. Obviously, we are not seen so by a large portion of the world’s population.  In the United States, most children know about Judaism, because they know what a Bar or Bat Mitzvah is.  It’s that big party that Jews through for their children, with lots of food, fancy clothes, dancing and entertainment, and they expect everyone to wear a sweatshirt about it the next week in school.  Needless to say, these are not the ways that we would want to be a shining beacon.

Early in this month, there has been an attempt to make a national moment of donation - “Giving Tuesday”, to follow the Retail Holy Week of Black Friday, Small Business Saturday, and CyberMonday.  The idea is that after we have spent so much on our loved ones and ourselves, we might feel better if we took a moment to also remember those less fortunate.  Certainly, we too have become trapped in the excesses of the season.  We elevate the minor holiday of Chanukah until it is the most famous of Jewish holidays; certainly the favorite of our children.  Perhaps this cold war of gift giving we engage in with Christmas might be better fought as a duel of donations.  My alma mater, approaching its recent yearly rivalry of the Game, challenged its alumni to beat Harvard not on the football field (where we did not), but on the giving side - to see which college could raise the most money for its annual campaigns.  We, too, if we want to be a light to the nations, at this festival of lights, should think again about the fires we fuel.

Let us encourage the mitzvot that we do for others.  Each time, at this season, our congregation has adopted families at King’s Daughters’ school in Plainfield, helping those who would otherwise not be able to give to each other at Christmas to receive a small amount of holiday cheer.  I know of several members of our congregation who make a point of volunteering at soup kitchens, hospitals, and other necessary services in order to let Christians celebrate their holiday.  Let this be the light that we celebrate on this festival; let this be the light we shine to others, be what they know about Jews and Judaism.

Let us also consider this as a time to give what is needed to others.  As we receive new clothing, let us donate what we no longer need.  Let us buy a little extra at the grocery store to give to others who may be hungry.  Let us think about what we spend on gifts, and take a night to chose places to donate some percentage of those funds.

As we light our Chanukah candles this year, let us think about more than the light the menorah shines in our homes, but also the light we can shine all over.

It's Good - Thanks - November 2014

Give thanks (to God), because it’s good.

Hodu l’Adonai ki tov - Psalm 136

This month, Temple Sholom will host, for the first time in our own home, the Scotch Plains/Fanwood Community Thanksgiving service  - on Monday, November 24th.  Each year the celebration moves to different houses of worship large enough to hold the service, which includes prayers from different faith communities, a dedication of our CropWalk funds, and a special collection for a fund or cause of the year. As hosts of this occasion, we hope that you will be present to welcome the rest of the community to our new home.

Why is it that we choose this time of year for an interfaith service?  We also come together as a community at Memorial Day, September 11th, and other dates of national significance.  Thanksgiving, too, is an expression of our national mood, a declared holiday to pause and give thanks for all that we have.  Whether or not we view the survival of the pilgrims in the same way as the native Americans might, we do understand that there is value in taking a moment to give thanks- and we find this sentiment not only common in our faith communities, but across our culture.

In our regular service, we have many opportunities to give thanks.  Scholars of prayer have divided Jewish prayer into three categories - prayers of general praise, prayers of petition, and prayers of thanksgiving.  The clearest prayer of thanksgiving in our regular liturgy is the hoda’ah, which comes toward the end of the t’filah, just before the prayer for peace and the silent prayer.  In this prayer, also known as the modim, we publicly acknowledge what we have been given, take a moment to see each moment as a miracle in itself, and thus worthy of thanks.

Notice in the above paragraph that I did not say thanks to God.  That was on purpose.  The term “God” is a loaded one in our society.  No matter how much we talk about God being a concept, or a placeholder for theology, people hear “God” and immediately think of an old man with a beard peering down from the heavens.  To be more clear, one does not have to believe in a Theistic God - a God who hears everything and responds to personal prayer - to give thanks.  One can be grateful no matter what one’s theology may be.  Even atheists can give thanks - and should.

Not everything on this earth comes from the work of our own hands.  Where and to whom we were born have had more influence on whether we struggle to feed ourselves in our daily lives than how well we scored on the SAT’s.  A truly just world would have opportunity and food for all - not only for those lucky enough to be born in a developed nation, with free primary education, clean water, a social welfare system, and advanced medical care.  Modesty is also a virtue.  In acknowledging all that we have received through no fault of our own, we become better people.  When we realize that we can lead the lives that we do because of a web of people whom we may not even know, we are more grounded.  That might even be enough, but, hopefully, such modesty and a realization of how much we rely on others can spur us to do what we can for those who may depend, unknowing, upon us.

As Thanksgiving approaches; as we prepare to give thanks with our greater Scotch Plains and Fanwood community, let us resolve not only to be more cognizant of all the blessings that we have in our lives, but also resolve to bring those blessings and more to others.  Truly, the best way to give thanks is to provide something that others will be thankful for.

Those Who Keep It Will Call It a Delight - October 2014

Shomrei shabbat v’korei oneg

Those who keep Shabbat and call it a delight Yism’chu Shabbat liturgy

While on Sabbatical last winter, I had an epiphany about communal worship.  We as a congregation had always talked about how communal worship - our mode of prayer together on Shabbat and holidays - was about the community.  The assumption that followed was that communal worship was about compromise. Since we cannot meet everyone’s need in a service at every moment, we would strive to create a service that had the most meaning for the most people.  For example, someone who wanted a quiet service, perhaps because they were observing a yahrzeit, would have to sometimes endure the more raucous parts of the service intended for those present more for oneg shabbat - the joyous celebration of Shabbat.  The unspoken rule was that in order to get the benefit of communal worship (as opposed to private prayer) one must give up something to the good of the community.

While this rule may be true, I realized that there was a corollary as well.  Participating in communal worship also gives something, as well as takes.  The very fact that everyone is engaged in the same process, because they are coming from different places, with different needs, and in different moods, lends power to the experience.  While we realized the strength and benefits of communal prayer, there was a piece that needed to be brought forward - the building of community.  This benefit of feeling the power of a community at prayer works best when one feels a part of the community.  How then do we build community at each service?

For some it is easy. In previous studies, we have found that the single most influential factor in people attending worship services is whether or not they feel they will know the people who will be there.  Less important is the music, the words, or, dare I say it, the sermon.  SMH (as they say on the internet).  Of course, the most important draw to communal worship is the sense of community.  Again, how do we build that into the service?

Having engaged in many activities with organizations such as the Reform Movement’s Just Congregations, I have learned that the first step of community-based organizing is establishing the community.  The way this is done is by sharing.  As human beings, we feel closer to others when we learn about them, see things we may have in common, find a way to sympathize, or share something ourselves.  All such organizational meetings begin with people sharing a personal story.  Ask one of our recent Board members, who spent a year talking about why they personally became a part of the Temple, and they will tell you how close they felt to those people who shared, or with whom they shared.

We already have two methods to build community this way in our worship service.  The first is ancient - the naming of those whose anniversary of death occurs in that week, known as yahrzeit.  The second is more recently adopted in the Reform Movement - the Mi Shebeirach for those who are ill.  In both cases, we hear the names of friends or relatives, or friends and relatives of our friends, and we share the hope for healing or the comfort in sorrow.

Since last January, we have made two changes in the service that should we should have publicized before, but (as I still prepare for Yom Kippur) I apologize for not bringing it up in this space sooner.

1. Sharing Memory - Now, when we read the names of shloshim (those who have died in the past month) or yahrzeit, we ask those who have come to worship and remember someone in particular to rise and share just a word or two, or a sentence about that person.  Just as we share stories at shivah services, this moment of sharing brings that person into the sanctuary, even if just as a memory.  The person who spoke can remain standing, until we all join them in saying the Mourners’ Kaddish.  No one is forced to share.  If there is a name on the list of someone without someone who remembers them present, and they were active in the Temple when I had a chance to know them, I will often share a word about that person myself.

2. Bringing Light into Shabbat - We already bring forward moments of sadness - when we remember those who have died, or those who are ill.  It seemed that we needed to also bring in moments of joy to share.  Now, when the congregation is not so large as to make it unwieldy, we have a new ritual after we light the Shabbat lights at the beginning of the service.  Each person or family is invited to share a moment that brought them light during the week, and they want to bring into Shabbat with them.  Just a word or two, or a sentence, is enough to share that moment and help build the congregation at the beginning of the services.  Our hope is that Shabbat services will become a place where congregants come to share their joys as well.

Both of these practices make the service a little longer,  Again, no one is forced to participate, but I have seen the smiles on the faces of those who have shared, as well as those who reflect that feeling in their own faces.  Sometimes a comment leads to a conversation at the oneg.  More often, the moment is one small brick in building the community for that Shabbat.

So, come back to Shabbat worship.  Join the community that we create each week.  Without you, things are different.  With you, we strengthen ourselves, lift ourselves up, and feel what communal worship is all about - community.  What is the difference between praying alone and in community?  Having others around to support and magnify our experience together.   Let us celebrate our community as we celebrate Shabbat.

Rabbi Abraham

Time to Turn - September 2014

Hashiveinu Adonai, v’nashuvah. chadeish yameinu k’kedem.

Return us, O God, and we will return. Renew our days, as of old.

Each year, as we enter the month of Elul, we begin the process of repentance, of s’lichot.  At our s’lichot service, beginning after the last Shabbat of the old year ends, when we dress our Torah scrolls and bimah for the High HolyDays, we ask God to help us turn back in the process of t’shuvah. We translate t’shuvah as repentance, but the literal meaning is turn and return.  We take a moment to look back over the path that we have traveled, the habits that have gradually worn a groove in our life’s journey, and we make a conscious choice to continue in the same manner, or to set off in a new direction.

This year, as a congregation, we have set off in a new direction together. We have reached a physical destination - our new home - and now we can take all the energy that we have expended in getting us to this place, and use it to strengthen our community; to travel in other ways, firmly rooted in our new home.  Just as we feel rested and renewed when we put down a heavy burden, the hard task of building the building is over.  Now we can remember all the other tasks that are needed to build a community.

Perhaps the time has come for you to build yourself - to take a class at the Temple; to begin (perhaps again) the study of Hebrew; to re-engage in the adult meaning of worship; to read and meet with others to discuss books, see movies, or to try a new spiritual practice.

Perhaps the time has come for you to (re-)build your family - carving out Shabbat as time to be together; finding a way to celebrate a holiday; joining in Family Track to learn as a family; or reach out to an estranged relative.

Perhaps the time has come for you to help build your community - to volunteer for a Temple event; to join a committee; to attend a Temple fundraiser; to seek a seat on the Board of Trustees; to make a donation to a meaningful fund.

Perhaps the time has come for you to build up the world around you - to help the congregation as we once again prepare to house the homeless; to bake a meatloaf and serve it to the hungry; to bring in canned goods for the Yom Kippur drive; to add your voice to others in calling for meaningful societal change and tikkun olam.

The High HolyDays come every year so that we need make no excuses for changing our habits, turning to new paths, trying something different.  Indeed, we are expected to do so; to look again at our lives and make sure we living in the way that we wish to live.  As we approach this new year together, let us lend each other strength to change, that we may all be renewed, together.

Shanah tovah.

We Stand Again at Sinai - Summer 2014

"We will do, and [then] we will hear." Na'aseh v'nishmah - Exodus 24:8

Hopefully by now you have either just attended or will soon attend our Erev Shavuot service (Tuesday, June 3rd, 7pm at the JCC).  Shavuot marks one of the most important and unique events in our history.  Much of Jewish history happens to us - we are freed from Egypt, rescued from Haman, etc. - but on Shavuot we remember the moment when we took up the responsibility of being Jews; of freely entering into covenant with God.  For that reason, Reform Jews have chosen this holiday for the moment of Confirmation.  At this moment, we recreate the myth that all Jews, past and future, stood together at Mount Sinai and, together, entered into covenant.  As Jews who have individually marked the beginning of their responsibility by becoming Bar or Bat Mitzvah, our Confirmands confirm their acceptance of their link in the chain of tradition (shalshelet hakabbalah).  In and out of time, we, too, stand with them.

The covenental moment at Mount Sinai was not the end of a journey, but the moment that our people girded up their loins and prepared to move on in the next stage of our history.  The next step to a new home took an entire generation to complete, but in the end, they arrived in the Promised Land - a land both flowing with milk and honey, but with its own challenges as well.  This summer, we too prepare ourselves for a new stage in Temple Sholom's centennial journey, as we pack and move into our new home, where we hope to celebrate our 101st High HolyDays, and, next year, a centenary of Confirmation.

When asked to enter into this covenant, our ancestors said, "Na'aseh v'nishmah" - we will do and we will hear.  The Rabbis interpreted this odd formulation as meaning that we agreed knowing that we were not completely sure what we were in for.  So, too, with Temple Sholom's journey.  There are many things that we do not know: How much will our heating bill be? How will we set up the seats for Rosh haShanah? What will we plant in the Children Garden? How will the Purim Carnival fit? Will we soon outgrow our new space?  We will discover answers as we go along (and see if we were correct in our estimations), but there are many things that we do know, and that we recommit ourselves to today, as we prepare for this next stage of Temple Sholom.

We are a learning community - committed not only to the lifelong education of all of our members, but to experimenting and learning how to be a better congregation. (Please note the work and recent report of Nan Fechtner and our Long Range Planning Committee.) We are a welcoming community - not only to our membership (made up of all those seeking to build a meaningful Jewish life, no matter what their background, family structure, or income), but to their families and the greater world outside our new walls.  We are a spiritual community - offering meaningful and engaging worship experiences, a guided journey through the Jewish calendar, and a place to share sorrows and joys.  We are an engaged community - helping not only ourselves but also making the world a better place by going outside our synagogue home to help and once again inviting in those who have no homes.

Na'aseh v'nishmah - we are already doing, and we will continue to hear, as we enter into this new step on our journey, as we renew our covenant to each other - and to the generations yet to be.